Dear Friends,

"Pound, Pound, Pound. I look up with a shiver at the large red door in front of me. Could this be it? Could they be here? I'm....I'm, not ready. I mean, yah, I wanted them to come. More than anything else. I sat and dreamed about it. When I was awake, when I was asleep. That little space inbetween. That's where I dreamt it the most. The day they came. I would stand up and smile. Catch myself in a mirror quickly to touch up my hair before I turn the golden handle. 'We came for you!' they would say and I would jump up and down on the inside. The outside remaining calm and cool. I would take their hand and they would walk me outside into the light. They would take me to the place. The place that makes me smile. Am I afraid to smile? Am I afraid to be happy? That's what is behind the door. Happiness. That doesn't make sense. I have tried everything to get outside. The the happy place. I tried to climb out the window, too high. Up the chiminey, to small. I still wonder how he fits down it. So why won't I open the door? It's right there in front of me. I stand, shaking, as cold as ice yet burning like fire. A short peek through the peephole confirms it's them. They have come to bring me to the place. The happy place. The place of smiles. The place where from I can do so much. More then I can do in here. Heck...I mean I'll be outside. The projects are endless. The possibilities know no not how to quit. And it all begins with a turn of a small golden nob. Round, slick, motionless. Except for the constant pounding that rings in my ears and seems to be getting more frequent. Soon I won't be able to take it. But, what do I do? Open the door? My heart, once in my chest now climbs it's way back up from my left foot. I walk slowly toward the door. I bypass the mirror. This is too important. It's hard to swallow and even harder to breathe as my hand touches the cool lukewarm door knob. My emotions are sweeping around and around as if they were caught up in a tornado. My only hope is to find the peaceful eye. A bead of sweat glistens down my forehead and I say aloud as if to convict myself. "It's time." Time to do, what I was meant to do. Time...to open the door."

Love you guys,
Antny