Dear Friends,

So there is this teddy bear. He is a cute cuddly little teddy bear. Never does anything wrong. All he wants in life are three things...

1) He wants to be in the BEAR PARADE. The biggest Teddy Bear event in Teddy Bear History of course. He doesnt' care if he is in front of all the other bears or anything like that. He just wants to be in the parade for once in his teddy bear life.
2) He wants to just go out on one date...ONE DATE...with the girlie bear of his dreams. With out anything going wrong....especially HIS TEDDY BEAR CAR BREAKING DOWN!!!!
3) He wants a Mitsubishi 3000 GT.

Now, This little cute, cuddly bunny...er...teddy bear is not a bad teddy bear. He enjoys life and overly gives himself for others (and not just others but, all the very bad little teddy bears out there.....shall we call them the "Trailer Doods"). He continues to help others before himself and is satisfied with that for he thinks someday....he will be rewarded.

Then...

A flamming ball of Cow-Dung falls out of the sky and nails this smaller than the average teddy bear. Next thing you know he is up to his ears in Crap.

Why does this happen? What did this cute little cuddly teddy bear deserve to have crap heaved at him. For that matter, who is heaving the crap? Finally what did this Crap-Heaver eat that makes his crap stink so badly. Little chunks of....anyway, I am off the subject.

Look into your lives. Is there a teddy bear that helps you out all the time being crapped on? Do me a favor and offer him or her and umbrella. I wish someone would offer me one.

I love you guys.

Anthony Doria